Sexuality

Let’s get down to the basics – Yum! Good!! Part 2

The founder of Diamond Heart work, AH Almaas writes, “Sexuality is a part of our basic nature. It is true acceptance and integration of our bodies and genitals; it is free and unconflicted Presence in our pelvis. It is our being, our Essence, allowed to exist and flow in our pelvis, to engorge our genitals. It is the experience of ourselves as pleasure, as delight, as beauty, as value.”

These eloquent words put a spiritual spin on Wilhelm Reich’s basic thesis that our erotic impulses are fundamental, vital to who we are as human beings. As you can tell, I’m still ruminating over the term asexual from a previous post on here. Forget all of the reading, the hours of studying somatics – deep in my soul I believe that erotic expression is essential to our very existence. Denying that part of ourselves makes us incomplete. Hey, don’t hate me cuz I’m pretty – this is what I believe.

Stand at any street corner or park yourself at a Starbuck’s and watch how men shift their pelvis as they move. You can usually spot who is tightly constricted or who is moving freely in their hips. Or, said another way, try and imagine who might be a good lover in bed (don’t even try to tell me you’ve never done this on a DAILY basis) and then work backwards, asking yourself what is it about this man that leads me think this? Most likely it is how they move in their bodies. And their nice butt….After all, it’s all about the basics!!

Yum – Good!

It is precisely because our present life is so inseparably linked with desire that we must make use of desire’s tremendous energy if we wish to transform our life into something transcendental.

– Lama Thubten Yeshe, Introduction to Tantra

My supervisor and I were chatting the other day about transexuals, intersexuals and asexuality, all rich topics for psychotherapy, and while he talked on this last topic I could feel my blood rising and my body harden. Asexuality is defined as: Asexuality is a sexual orientation describing individuals who do not experience sexual attraction or do not have interest in or desire for sex. Sometimes, it is considered a lack of a sexual orientation. One commonly cited study placed the incidence rate of asexuality at 1%.
I find this topic fascinating in that it is totally counter to all that I believe in – there’s a BIG ol part of me that wants to find something wrong with this position. The function of the orgasm is vitally important in our lives, if only seen by the physiological manifestations. Through orgasm, a shitload of oxytocin is released into the bloodstream that some call the attachment hormone.

In addition, oxytocin is released in the pre-cum of men (yuuuuum!) and during Kegel exercises (yes, this is exactly what we do in class). I FIRMLY believe that orgasms, whether with your five-fingered BF or your real live horny as shit BF, are vital to our well-being and our relationships.

Go get em Tiger…….